It recently came to my attention that the Pussycat Dolls have a new song out.
Ok I might as well say it. I watched T4. Confession over.
Now, interested as I am in the issues behind gender inequality and female empowerment in the workplace, I was pretty intrigued by the lyrics of the ridiculously catchy When I Grow Up.
In contrast with their charming debut single, Don’cha, (“Don’cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me”), the Dolls’ new record is altogether more introspective.
Boys call you sexy (What’s up, sexy)
And you don’t care what they say
See, every time you turn around
They screamin’ your name
When I grow up
Fresh and clean
Number one chick when I step out on the scene[Verse 1]
Now I’ve got a confession
When I was young I wanted attention
And I promised myself that I’d do anything
Anything at all for the boys to notice me[Bridge]
But I ain’t complaining
We all wanna be famous
So go ahead and say what you wanna say
You know what it’s like to be nameless
Want them to know what your name is
‘Cause see when I was younger I would say[Chorus]
When I grow up
I wanna be famous
I wanna be a star
I wanna be in movies
When I grow up
I wanna see the world
Drive nice cars
I wanna have Groupies*When I grow up
Be on TV
People know me
Be on magazines
When I grow up
Fresh and clean
Number one chick when I step out on the scene[Hook x2]
But be careful what you wish for
‘Cause you just might get it
But you just might get it
But You just might get it[Verse 2]
They used to tell me I was silly
Until I popped up on the TV
I always wanted to be a superstar
And knew that singing songs would get me this far[Bridge]
[Chorus]
[Verse]
I see them staring at me
Oh I’m a trendsetter
Yes this is true ’cause what I do, no one can do it better
You can talk about me
‘Cause I’m a hot topic
I see you watching me, watching me, and I know you want it
[Chorus]* Groupies is pronounced ‘Boobies’
Aside from the ‘fresh and clean’ bit, which I suppose is quite good for promoting personal hygiene, I’ve got to say the overall message here is kind of depressing. The whole whether-it’s-meant-to-sound-like-boobies-when-they-sing-groupies is a separate debate that I’m not getting into – besides, lead boobie-pronouncer Nicole surely cleared it all up when she told Ellen DeGeneres “it’s open to interpretation and some of us want boobies”.
What bothers me more about the song is that it’s such a proud example of the pervasive raunch culture that encourages girls to disempower themselves, bump by sordid grind. Even Steve Jones was shocked at the girls’ risque moves on the T4 soundstage. “It’s amazing we’re allowed to show that at this time of the morning,” he laughed. The revelation for me (which I’m sure most of you already know) was that the Pussycat Dolls are not just any other super-branded girl band with a tidal wave of adolescent girls aping their every wriggle, but in fact a real x-rated burlesque troupe.
If the girls performed this song every night on a Sunset Strip stage, where they were originally resident in 1995, I couldn’t care less.The problem is, the PCD’s management want the Doll Domination to be total. And that means tapping one of the most lucrative market groups around: kids and teenagers. In fact in 2006, the toymaker Hasbro created a set of plastic dolls based on the band, to be marketed at 6 to 9 year old girls. Luckily the wave of protest that erupted persuaded Hasbro to cancel the Pussycat line before it reached stores.
That didn’t stop the PCD from expanding their merchandise. On stardoll.com, (a “virtual paperdoll community” with 21,200,240 members, most of whom are aged 7 – 17) you can dress up Melody, Nicole and co. in knee high leather boots, hot pants and a bra, though actually the PCD are the least fun paperdolls on the site since their wardrobes are limited by the fact that they’re the real thing – branded clothing – rather than fun fantasy outfits.
(NB. The admittedly very entertaining stardoll site does make a gesture at some kind of female empowerment, in the form of a page entitled ‘Role Models‘. Apparently, girls, our leading role models are Coco Chanel, Rosa Parks, Beatrix Potter, Forest Fairy (??), and Venus. That would be Venus, as in the mythical goddess of beauty. Great.)
It’s not that I think the Pussycats intend any harm with their fixed-smile fetishization of fame and mindless attention-seeking. Like Nicole says: “The Pussycat Dolls have no boundaries. We continue to stretch and find ourselves in every performance. We do what is truthful for each of us.” Bless. I’d be suprised if the Dolls even had the brains to think past their own shiny latex wardrobe. They’re dolls, right? Here the group claims the ‘When I Grow Up’ song is meant to be a warning, though of what exactly?
I think people see us and think: ‘Wow, I want to do that. I want to be famous, I want to see the world, I want nice cars, I want groupies.’ But it’s not going to be an easy road getting there and it’s not as glamorous as it always seems.”
OK. So the warning is not that maybe there’s more to life than fame, but that getting there might be tricky?
The fact is that girls could really do with better role models than a group of strippers who glorify the single-minded pursuit of fame and boobies (or groupies, for that matter).
One recent study found that 63 per cent of teenage girls aspired to be topless models rather than doctors or teachers, while 25 per cent considered lap dancing a “good career choice”. Unfortunately, as this former dancer testifies, it’s not. The Pussycat Dolls insist we’re all pussycat dolls-in-waiting, that – like they said in their TV show, The Pussycat Dolls Present: The Search for the Next Doll – “inside every woman is a pussycat doll”. Presumably with limitless potential to strip and grind and be watched, and thus have value, if only we believe in ourselves enough, right?
The weird thing is that if Pink were to sing ‘When I Grow Up’ it would be hilarious; a piercing satire of the objectification of women. As it is, it’s just really very sad.
